Sunday, September 28, 2014

My Unpopular Opinion

How do you get your hair like that? Can I touch it? What kind of make up do you use? Why can't you eat that? Everyone else is doing it, why aren't you? Is it against your religion? What school do you go to? What's it's like being home schooled? You must not have any friends, huh? Let me give you my daughter's number. You must be so lonely. You're home schooled so you stay in the house all day. You don't understand, you're home schooled. What college do you want to go to?
These are just a few of the questions and statements that I get asked on a daily basis. At first, I got really bothered when someone asked me a question about what I eat, about my education or my religion, but I've learned to just live with it. Now, I have all the answers to those questions all filed away in my brain so if anyone wants to know, I can just pull it out.
Many different people ask me these questions. Not just my peers, but adults. (Heck, most of the people I talk to are adults. Literally, I am surrounded by adults. It's like I have at least 4 different versions of my mom watching me on the internet. But ily guys, I really do) Most of the adults ask me about my education. Sometimes when I tell them I am home schooled, they give me a look, or even a grunt of disapproval, which used to hurt my feelings, but now I really don't care. I know my mom is giving me a good education.
Then we have my peers. (Oh boy) Sometimes I like other teenagers, sometimes I don't. Call me anti-social, arrogant, or whatever you want but that's just how I feel. It's really rare when I actually meet someone around my age that I actually like and can have a normal conversation with. I'm 15 and I feel like I'm 40 something. I feel more comfortable talking to adults than I do with my peers. It's weird, I know. That's just because I'm used to hanging around adults. I'm really close with my mom and she has cool friends so I used to hang out with them sometimes. And then when I came back around people my age, I felt like I was around 2nd graders. And of course, they ask me questions too. There's always the curiosity and the marveling of my hair. (There will be a hair rant later because omg there's so much on that topic. brb, headache) Then we have the question about my religion which always eventually comes up, since most teenagers these days are atheists or Buddhist and I am a Christian. There's the big "Christians are awful" parade, which I've also surprisingly learned to live with. And there is also the whole, "Why aren't you dancing? Don't you like this song?" thing. Okay, let's be clear: I love dancing. I'm not the best dancer, but who cares? Dancing is fun. Nevertheless, sometimes a song might come on that I don't feel comfortable dancing to. I don't want to dance to a song where all the artist is singing about is what goes on during a one night stand or hookup up with someone at the club. I don't know, those sorts of things bother me. Oh, and those songs where all artist does is sing or rap about a girl's body? That's a big no. Totally annoying and hashtag superficial. For example, Wiggle by Jason Derulo. I only had to hear like 15 seconds of the song before I was offended. Just saying. If you haven't heard that song, you really don't want to hear it. Trust me. It's just no. I don't even want to discuss it.
But the thing is, most of my peers actually like this stuff. At first I found it hard to believe, but now, I actually expect everyone around me to like the most disturbing of things. Okay, so let me just go ahead and say this, just so we're clear: I don't like my generation.
Sorry, not sorry.
Part of me does, and another part of me doesn't. I feel like I was born at the wrong time or something. Can it be the 50's again? Okay so if you're a teenager reading this, it's not like I don't like YOU. It's just that I don't like some of the things that we're being exposed to, you know?
 Sometimes when I look at music videos, or go on Twitter or Facebook, I just begin to feel slightly ashamed and or bothered by the things I see. It seems like everything good eventually turns to the bad side. For example, there is this girl group that I used to like. They appeared to be very innocent and fun, and I loved their sound. And lately, they came out with a new single. I felt a little shaky about it since I saw the album art first. They were wearing less clothing than usual, but I ignored it. Then a few days after the song was released, the music video came out. And let's just say that I was very disappointed with the video. I know that it's not their fault and that the director of the video and their management or whatever made them do it, but come on. Can't there be some appropriateness in this world? They were hardly wearing any clothes at all. They were wearing "shorts" which looked like they were just underwear to me, to be honest. And to make it worse, they're all girls of color. Okay, now I know you're probably thinking, "Here we go again, another black girl going on about how black people have it harder than everyone else." but that's not the case. In this girl group, there are girls of different races. In the music video, I of course noticed that the black girl was front and center while they were so called dancing. And this was the kind of dancing that was very provocative and sexual and just not good for a girl group that minors watch and look up to. It was just the most awful thing I've seen in a while. Frankly, most of their fans loved it. I looked on their Facebook page and saw all the comments that their fans were posting. They were quoting the song's lyrics with smiley faces and saying stuff like this:
 They were also saying how talented they were in the video. Okay so it's considered a talented to nearly strip dance on a video that thousands upon thousands of people are going to watch? No, I don't think so. Literally, everywhere I look now, the music video is there taunting me. I love this girl group, (or I did) but the music video upsets me. It's so sad. I literally wanted to cry when I saw it. Thankfully there was one person who noticed something. Only ONE out of millions.

I do understand that in the entertainment business, some people do crazy or wild things to get more people talking about them. But I think that this is just unacceptable. It's not good at all. I almost wanted to cry when this happened. Literally, everyone in the music business, and all the actors and everyone eventually start doing raunchy things. For example, when a certain boy band went from singing about what makes you beautiful, to "tonight let's get some." and "why don't we go there?". It's just wrong. Over the years, I've just learned to stop liking particular bands or singing groups so much, because they will disappoint you. If you're too hung up on someone, they WILL let you down. It's okay, they're only human, just like you and me. But what I can't stand is all these teenagers looking up to all these people doing all these awful things, and then copying them. Everyone seems to have a celebrity role model that they follow. If their role model gets their hair cut a certain way, they have to get their hair cut that way too. Their role model decides it's cool to take selfies throwing up gang signs and middle fingers, so they think it's cool too. Their role model wakes up one morning and says, "Hey, drugs and alcohol are cool." so their admirers start to drink and take drugs.
I look up to certain people too. A few are celebrities, yes. But just because you like someone for the songs they sing or the movies they play in, doesn't mean you have to do whatever they do. And I know it's not just me who feels this way. There are other girls who are tired of seeing their favorite singers pole dance for millions of people at a time. There are other girls out there who want to do something different, something that will actually help other people or make a difference. There are other girls out there who actually respect themselves and their bodies and know that they are valuable and important. There are other girls out there who feel uncomfortable with this. The question is, are you one of these girls?
If so, you're my new best friend.
And if you're not one of these of girls, then your negative comments will not shake my unpopular opinion.


  1. I am 37, and have felt the same way about being born at the wrong time my whole life. We are just old souls.
    Keep on keeping on!

    1. Thank you so much for your encouraging words and support! I am glad you are able to relate. :) <3

  2. Christina G, what an awesome message. I agree with you on all points. I am one of those older adults you have had opportunity to be around and can I tell you that each time I am in your presence, I learn something valuable. I am a grandmother of one pre-teen and two teenagers and I am concerned about the kind of music they are exposed to and the peers that have little or no respect for each other and even adults. Your values are wholesome and I am going to share this blog with my grandkids, Thanks so much for sharing. I am so very proud of your accomplishments. Self Pro-claimed Auntie Verl.

    1. Thank you so much for your comments. It's very pleasant receiving some positive feed back from my new blog post. Apparently, people don't seem to take it very well when you speak out these types of subjects. This is probably the most courageous thing I've done in a while. I really do humbly appreciate your kind words. I hope your grandkids get something from my blog post. I know the post is entitled "My Unpopular Opinion", but I know that one day, my opinion will impact the lives of other teenage and pre-teen girls. They will understand that they don't have to do, say and wear all the things they see in the media. Beauty speaks for itself. ^-^